Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Hunting the Misses.

salam aleykum,

perhaps I can get some advice from the sisters, since for a while hardly any bros been poping up here..

So...

say..
There is this sister in my uni.. she is sitting down under a tree (on a chair) reading a book. She seems interesting.. and she doesnt seem like from around.. ya3ni not a local (Egyptian)..

well if there was a girl in the past that was so interesting (like back when i was 17) i would just go up to her and have a chat.. well i dont think i have done that with someone i wasnt aquianted to or at least saw somewhere........ WELL.. now i cant do that...

how do I approach such a sister since am interested.. like I dont talk to females generally and if i did its only class mates and doesnt exceed like.. a minute or 2... So if I approach any girl it looks weird anyway.. and if she looks like a "sister" like she could freak out if i just say yo am looking for a wife mind if i talk to you ? ( i mean of course in a nicer more eloquent way)

I mean i have the courage to such a thing.. am not worried about actually doing it.. but how do i best maximize chances of making her interested...

Dont tell me ask a bro who has a sister or married.. coz no.. they just too lazy and it never happens...

or do I just sit and have a chat with her... and maybe she will get it ?

suggestions?

22 comments:

sara said...

Alaikum assalam,

Well, It happened with me, I was sitting & this dude approached & said, exactly: "I want to ask for your hand, how do I do that?".. I freaked out & said mistakingly: "this is crazy".. lol.. & then, I caught my breath & I told him "please gimme a minute" & then called mom from my cell & she said: "just give him baba's number".. I was sooooooo shy that i couldn't talk, so I wrote baba's number on a piece of paper & gave it to him after he came back & that was it..

As you are looking for the halal, nothing better than straighforwardness & honesty.. I tell ya, I was so mad at him that he just said that LIKE THAT, but when I cooled down, I realised, there was nothing better that he could have done..

May Allah make it easy for all shabab to get married & may the next generation be a better one.. Amen.

sara said...

Oh yeah, I just remembered.. He also said: "if you're not engaged or anything..".. That is important to say too..

MASS said...

sara

wa3aleykum as-salam wa rhmat Allahi wa barakatuhu

"this is crazy" ! :S yeah this is sort of what i would think would happen , she would say it to herself if she didnt say it out loud..

jazakum Allahu khairan for your comment..

LuLu...! said...

just tell her,
hi, im 3abdel samee3...
and i want ur daddy's num...!

:D

Man of Letters said...

Haha biltawfeej bro! Let us know how it goes. Maybe she slaps you? :P

MASS said...

lulu

ma3lesh, yr still 17, I once was 17 too..
hyper ktcheer?

ehm..

MAL
Jazax B, laa a slap would never happen my Aura overwhelms the atmosphere, it would like paralize her, even without releasing my sword :P

LuLu...! said...

thats wat i get after i tell u wat i think u shod do???

:(
THANKS

MASS said...

matez3alsh ya bora3ie.

Creation said...

Do your istikhara and step forward. Perhaps, you can get a professor of yours involved in this whole process so that the girl doesn't get the shock of her life when you would apporach her. And if that doesn't work out then simply rip off her personal information from the uníversity record ..hehe.. now I would do that :P

Beautiful said...

NEVER speak to a girl you want to marry directly, try to reach her wali , just find away and I assert DO NOT approach her whatsoever.

MASS said...

creation

istikhara.. what if she s just there and i may never see her again... unless i do a quick one like in the corner.. ok the second idea doesnt seem feasable

beautiful

the point is I assume I dont know her, dont know anyone who knows her,, and its unlikely i see her again.. now I totally agree about the wali thing..

but what if i cant reach him.. do I go ask her? and what if she says I dont have a wali ?

UmmBlog said...

I do agree with Sara.

Question for Beautiful: If a guy would have approached you directly, what would you have done ?

Mass: I don't find anything wrong with direct approach at all. Although, I wouldn't deny the fact that some sisters might jump, scream or may even slap the guy. But then I guess, it's simply because they brain doesn't know how to react in such a situation..lol

MASS said...

Ummblog

or maybe faint ?

oh well.. jazakum Allahu khairan

Umm said...

Salaam alaikum.

If you do ask her her directly, make sure you ask her to give her wali's number.

But how can you be so sure that she's the right one?

Best of luck!

MASS said...

umm
wa3aleykum as-salam

well am not sure, you just see if you folks is compatible..

dont day best of luck, no such thing as that!

jazakum Allahu khairan

Umm said...

It's a bad habit..I must stop saying that!

Well...
I hope it went well...

MASS said...

hope it went well?

well,, this was all hypothetical..

Kay said...

What ever happened to giving a girl some pretty flowers?

(I'd probably want the guy to ask if our parents could meet each other to speak about a possible marriage between the families.)

MASS said...

Kay.

ahh the flowers, well thats a like, display of affection. wont do it on the first time, maybe when engaged (and probably better not) and definatly inshaAllah after marriage.

MASS said...

and for your later part of the comment, thats not very american of you !, perhaps old fashioned but cool!.

emma said...

if it was me id be slighly offended that you didnt know anything about me by immediatly asking for my wali's number. Judged me within a few seconds, based on what exactly?

but then id probably realize it was a compliment:)

so did you end up seeing her again?

MASS said...

when you been a Bro for quite some time and from a young age, you become a Pro in picking out a good sister catch.

I never met again nope, coz i never met her in the first place, this is all hypothetical !